The last few nights this song has been popping into my head. I hadn’t heard it for many years, so I had to look it up to listen to it because I feel such a strong connection to Tommy through this song. It was one of our songs from our dance club days – a song that goes best with late night listening. We used to listen to it in the car or in his bedroom. One of us had the 12″ record, so we listened to all the versions.
When I listened to it again tonight it felt so different to me this time. The song used to feel very dreamy to us, like a magical sort of lullaby. But, tonight… hearing it without Tommy… it felt very… very sad. Suddenly many of the lyrics applied to Tommy, and I felt like I was sending this song out into the universe to him. I imagined the song reaching high up to him, and I felt like ET standing there on the edge of the cliff with his Speak & Spell when he was trying to “phone home”, hoping to be heard.
Even the sounds of bells at the end of this song sounded like they were calling out to Tommy:
Tommy, I know I’m not the only one trying to “phone home” to you. Many songs have been popping into my head that I haven’t thought of in years and I keep thinking it’s because of you.
I hadn’t been able to post anything lately, but I will be picking it up again. I hope everyone else is doing okay. We’re all trying to be positive and keep Tommy’s sense of humor going, and we will keep that up as best as we can, but we’re also all feeling a huge sense of loss, and the pain that goes along with that. It’s still hard for me to believe, even though the reality of it has hit me many times. I’m sure anyone who has ever loved Tommy or appreciated his sense of humor or his unique, full-of-life spirit will understand the range of emotions that comes with such a loss.
I’m sure Tommy would want me to end this on a happy note, so I sat here a while trying to find something and it finally came to me. Samson the Cat. Samson was always looking out the front door window whenever we arrived. It was very sweet the way Samson liked to keep an eye on things. He seemed to have a wise, sweet spirit. He was the first cat I ever got to know pretty well, since I grew up with dogs. Because of this, I learned Samson’s meow as THE cat meow. Tommy used to imitate Samson’s meow & I started doing it too.
Many years later, I was visiting my husband’s sister and we were talking about cats, then she and I started meowing for some reason. When I meowed, she said “That’s a Siamese!!” I said, “It is? It’s the meow I really know – my friend Tommy’s cat, Samson… and he was a Siamese! I never made the connection that Siamese cats had a different kind of meow!”
So, Samson set the standard for me. His meow is the meow I know well, and I can still hear both Samson, and Tommy meowing like Samson, in my head. Tommy has said “Meow” in many ways over the years, but the “Meow” I know best, is the Samson “Meow”.
Bless your heart, your so right! Wonderful memories of such a unique person, my nephew. 😘
Jan, Thank You!
I love the photos you have shared! Dave emailed them to me so I could put them on this site. If there are anymore to share, I’d love to see more some day! I have much more to scan, but it will take time.
I can imagine you have many wonderful memories of the cousins playing together as kids. I told Adela that I heard so much about Tommy’s childhood from him that he almost made me feel like I had been there too. Even though I have never been to Pittsburg, Texas, I will never forget it because of Tommy. I only wish he had written the stories down. Maybe over time more people will share memories, and that will help us all jog our own memories.
I was think I g is Sampson today. Sampson was the 1st Siamese I grew to love… We have one now. I think of Tommy every time I see him.
You are right about the music… There are so many songs that remind me of Tom… So so many good memories.
Speaking of old Tommy songs from the 90’s, Do you remember that little song Tommy wrote.. Just as a joke I think, but I still hear him singing it:
Lip lip-stick
Qui qui La Mode Glamour Francais…
God he loved music.
Jeanni,
WOW! That song “Qui qui La Mode Glamour Francais” you mentioned that he did… I hadn’t thought of that in 20 years, but WOW the second I read it, I could hear it too!! Reading that felt like the same feeling as opening a great storage chest and pulling out a treasure! Now that I think about it, Tommy would prefer me to compare it to older Rose discovering old treasures from the Titanic. 😉
Seriously though, that was awesome reading that!
And great timing too… because earlier today in my mind, I heard Tommy say “Bonjour, Precis!” which brought back this memory:
He used to work for a boutique at the mall, I think maybe Valley View Mall, with the French name Precis, and they had to answer the phone, “Bonjour, Precis!”
So, we used to say it with a very southern accent for fun and imagine what it would sound like when people called if he answered the phone “Bonjurrrrrr Prayyyyysis” with an exagerrated southern accent.
Now that we are going the French route, I remember I used to have this cassette tape I bought from Express, the clothing store, that had all pop songs from France on it. Tommy LOVED that tape, and we used to sing along like we knew what we were singing, but we had no idea.
Give your kitty a special hug from me, in memory of Sampson & Tommy. I can imagine Tommy would go right up to your cat and give him all sorts of kitty love while using his kitty cat speaking voice.
I just had another cat memory! Tommy used to pretend to play bagpipes with Sampson. With love, of course.
If any of these things jog any memories, feel free to share!
Found the Express French cassette tape! Thanks to YouTube, for having almost everything!
If anyone ever feels like listening to French music while thinking of Tommy, maybe while cooking a French meal some evening or having coffee or something, listen to this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G964ytuz9_E
His favorite, as I recall, was the first track… something about Picasso. Just imagine him singing along with all his enthusiasm and you’ll feel the Tommy love!
I’m going to try it myself sometime soon. I listened to the Cocteau Twins today thinking of him, but ended up in the full rainstorm of tears. I think this French album may bring on more of the perky Tommy spirit we need right now. Really the whole world could use more of the perky Tommy spirit right now.
For Mary so many memories are flooding back!!! He worked at that coffee shop for a bit at Collin Creek mall… I remember going in and trying to find a flavor I would like!! And then… Denney’s. How many nights did we spend at Denny’s just to hang out with Tommy. I know I have pictures somewhere of him at Denny’s. Omg. If you are ever in Dallas we have to get together… Sooo doo many memories
Jeanni, YES! Kelly’s Coffee & Fudge! What timing!
Literally just last night out of nowhere I smelled that smell – the way Tommy’s apron and clothes used to smell when he was done working at Kelly’s Coffee & Fudge. I went through that feeling of “Am I imagining this?” I even looked around to see if there was cocoa or something nearby.
Do you remember that smell? He used to smell like a combination of coffee and fudge after working there. I hadn’t smelled that exact scent since then, until last night for a moment.
That place was so nice. It was ahead of its time.
I remember Denny’s too! Do you remember where it was though? Was it on Fitzhugh? It was definitely a drive. I remember him taking pride in his work at both of those places, being very attentive to the customers.
Tommy used to keep a bottle of cologne in his glovebox in those days. I think he had Drakkar at first & then Aspen. I had to pause a long time to remember the name of the second one & then it suddenly hit me “Aspen!”, so I looked it up to see if it was a green bottle with the tree on it, and sure enough, it is! I always liked that scent. If we could combine it with coffee and fudge, we’d have the full scent of Tommy’s car in the early 90’s. If only someone sold a candle with that whole combination!
Oh! I just remembered at one point he worked at a diner in Deep Ellum that had an open air patio on the second floor. I think it was called Starlight Diner. I remember him being very excited telling me about hearing a Tori Amos cover of “Smells Like Teen Spirit” while he was there one day. We were both big Tori Amos fans, so of course we had to search all over the place to find and buy her cover version of that song.
Now that brings back more memories. Going to Sound Warehouse and other record stores like Bill’s Records and Tapes to search and search for music. Wow. Kids these days have no idea what a hunt that was! I remember Sound Warehouse had headphones with just a few featured CDs you could listen to. That’s where we originally discovered Tori Amos. I remember he bought Tori Amos’ “Crucify” that day and I bought Sophie B. Hawkins’ album because I loved the song “Damn, I wish I was your lover”. We ended up only listening to that one song on Sophie’s album, but we both became obsessed with Tori Amos’ Crucify. Soon after, I ended up buying that CD too. I have probably listened to that album more than any other album in my lifetime, broke the CD, and bought it again. Little by little, Tommy learned all the songs on the piano for that album. I loved to sing along. That album reminds me of many nights driving on Central Expressway with wind in our hair, just listening to the album. Those were our deeper moments – not laughing or singing like maniacs, but just listening and feeling the wind. That was bliss to me.
If I am in Dallas some time, I’d love to get together, Jeanni! We could gather up coffee, fudge, Aspen cologne, and a whole collection of Tommy-isms for the full Tommy experience. Even if we didn’t have any of that, I’m sure just being a child at heart would be enough to feel connected to Tommy.
I do remember that smell of coffee and fudge… And the catty manager he had there!!
Denney’s was off 75 between Fitzhugh and Henderson.. You are right. I know I have pictures of him at Denny’s… They should have just changed that location’s name to Tommy’s!!!
Omg he loved convertibles!!!!! And you are right about the cologne!! I had forgotten that!! Tommy Kirby driving down 75 with the top down and the wind blowing and music blaring. Headed out to the Station to dance all night.. And good lord could he take over a dance floor!!! That thought just makes me smile Mary!!
I think he introduced me to Tori Amos as well. I listen to her at work sometimes. Some of my favorite memories are sitting and listening to him play the piano I think. That was magic.
Do you still have the picture of you two at the prom? That may be the greatest prom picture EVER!!!
I have been thinking back about all the times with Tom… There isn’t just one good memory… There were far too many good memories to pick one. He had a way of lighting up the place… Even through the tears… Thinking about the moments shared with Tom and his smile and laughter just makes my heart smile. He lived fully in every moment. And he brought you into the light so you could dance on the stars with him.